I turn 22 tomorrow.
I am still not sure how I feel about that, for some reason I feel more affected by this one then my 21st.
I don't even feel twenty and not maturity wise or anything, I feel nearer to 30 in my mind sometimes. It's more like I feel young in spirit. I am a well of inspiration right now, and I want to spend my days painting, drawing, reading, drinking tea and coffee, eating sweets, and basking in the sun.
This is obviously not a very realistic state of mind to have, especially at 22. I feel like every age comes with expectations and once you reach your twenties you are expected to have your life together, or at least be getting it together.
I have fall into neither of these categories. If I was being honest I have nothing together. Believe me when I say nothing.
That's the miserable part, I am a perfectionist with some OCD tendencies. So the fact that I don't have my life sorted out, drives me crazy. People also love to point out the things they think you are doing wrong, and I seem to do a lot wrong.
Yet in spite of all of this, I am happy. I like that I am not tied down or committed to anything, how my life is going to turn out at this point is anyone's guess. I have my dreams and hopes for the future, and I am going to chase those.
I am leaving it up to God where I go from here, and that is the magical part.